Diets

Episode blurb
Our obese listeners Long haired hippie girls riding horses Gross diet pills Bikinis with diapers built in Clammy pervert hands Dee Snider at Starbucks Terrible impulses Illicit bathroom activities The Gauntlet Special celebrity ghost

Running Gags

 * Tom does a questionable accent
 * Tom is obese

Quotes
Tim: "I just don't like anybody who's REALLY into anything."

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Tim: "How often do you get diarrhea, Tom. Is that too personal? Okay. Stricken. Stricken from the record."

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Tom: "Every moron thinks that their kid is going to grow up to be somebody famous."

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Tim: "The other day I was in a store with somebody and there was a whole section of glassware.. and it really took every ounce of self-control I had to not just grab her and throw her into a display of wine glasses and china."

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Tom: "When I'm on the subway in the morning and I see a woman dressed up nice, I assume she's a high-class hooker on her way to a client who likes early morning sex."

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Tom: "... we're very appreciative of everyone who's kept [Amazon link] in mind when they're all 'OMG, I'm outta condoms!'"

Tom:
"There was one night I got drunk when I was an RA. I could tell there was a party next door - they were all in the hallway &amp; there was beer pouring under my door. And I can't deal with this. Because I'm drunk. If I don't do anything, that's even worse, and I really really had to pee. So I peed in a Pepsi bottle - I opened my window, backed up all the way, and threw it as hard as I could ... it went flying out the window. And I hear a huge crash, a car alarm go off and a pop. The thing popped wide open. And then I hear,'Yo. Did someone just throw a Pepsi bottle full of piss out the window?' Then I closed the window and went to bed."